Tuesday, April 24, 2018

The Secret

November 12th, 2008

…by Prill Boyle Like Jenna in the movie Waitress, Michele Albano has turned her passion for pies into a thriving business. Her grandmother tutored her in the art of pie making as a little girl, but it wasn\’t until Michele saw a Food Network show on America\’s top ten pie companies that she thought to herself, “I can do this as a career!” At the time, Michelle was working as a real estate agent, a job that paid the bills but didn\’t excite her. Exhilarated by the prospect of making pies for a living, she began to research the business. Her plan was to start... Read More

The Sounds of Silence

October 14th, 2008

…by Prill Boyle When my husband was in college in the early \’70s, he spent an entire semester not speaking except during class. Practicing silence, he says, not only heightened his senses but upped the volume of his inner voice. It also made him aware of how much people talk and how little they say. Today we talk more than ever. We walk around with little plastic boxes held to our ears, jabbering into space, oblivious to the people and beauty all around us. Precious moments of time that we might have once spent in thought, or reverie–driving to work, walking down the street,... Read More

New Stressors but Familiar Solutions

September 14th, 2008

How have our stressors changed over the years? It may seem that the primary sources of our stress have been the same over our lifetime or even over the centuries. But this is not true. In my ongoing Women\’s Midlife Group which I have conducted for over 17 years at my clinic in Northern CA, we had a recent discussion about how our lives have changed…stressors that we must face that our mothers and grandmothers didn\’t face, particularly at this phase of life. The most recent stressor is that many of the women, single or married, are losing their homes in the recent mortgage crisis.... Read More

Cultivating Resilience

September 12th, 2008

…by Prill Boyle I love all four seasons. No matter how bleak the winter has been, by April the hydrangeas next to my porch are budding, the copper beach and pin oaks are leafing out, and the lilies of the valley are once again poking their stems through the earth. Not every plant makes it through the winter, of course. My loamy Connecticut soil is less than ideal, for instance, for growing lavender; every few seasons I have to replace mine. But each year, most of my garden survives. We human bloomers, late or otherwise, are a resilient bunch as well. We have to be for the seeds of our... Read More

The Economics of Pursuing a Passion

August 11th, 2008

…by Prill Boyle In this economy, it\’s easy to think that pursuing a passion is a luxury we can\’t afford. But here\’s what I think: Can we afford not to follow our hearts? (How far does our pessimism ripple outward when we\’re unhappy?) Can we afford not to be positive role models for the next generation? Can America, can an imperiled earth, truly afford less? When we ask ourselves what gives us joy and make room for that in our lives, even just a few moments here and there, it\’s not only us that reaps the benefit; it\’s everyone. Take Matt Harding.... Read More

Jumping Out of Your Comfort Zone

July 16th, 2008

…by Prill Boyle Last October one of the readers of this column, a 47-year old wife and mother, e-mailed me for advice and encouragement. She wanted to pursue her dream of becoming a makeup artist, but wasn\’t sure she had the courage “to jump out of her comfort zone.” She worried that she wouldn\’t be able to compete with the young, gorgeous women she saw populating the makeup field and wasn\’t sure she was skilled enough to land a job. I urged her to be bold, pointing out that she had already taken a step by writing me. “Forty-seven is the perfect time to start... Read More

RETIREMENT—THE BEGINNING OR THE END

June 15th, 2008

In what way is retirement an end phase of life? For women who are still working outside the home as the time for retirement approaches, retirement is an important transition signaling the end of a career. That career may have occupied all of their adult years or have been launched when they stepped out of the parenting role. It might have been part time to supplement or complement the family income or as the primary provider. For the majority of women, that career was juggled with responsibilities in the home and in the community. The transition may be fuzzier or non-existent for women who chose... Read More

STEPPING BACK ON THE SIDEWALK

May 12th, 2008

Do you feel you\’re getting off track? Those of you who have been following my columns with NABBW may have noticed that my last new column was a few months back. Quite often my patients assume that because I am a therapist, I am immune to the ups and downs of life. They forget that I learned my professional skills in school and through years of practice, and that, underneath the professional veneer, I am the same vulnerable and sometimes off track human being that they are. In fact, most appreciate when I occasionally share my personal experiences (which I do only after I feel I have begun... Read More

Heeding the Call

April 14th, 2008

…by Prill Boyle Have you ever wondered what your calling is? A few weeks ago, I began a speech by asking how many members of my middle-aged audience still didn\’t know what they wanted to be when they grew up. After a few giggles, more than a quarter of the people in the room raised a hand. Some might argue that if you haven\’t found a calling by the time you\’re in midlife, chances are you won\’t. Meg Wolitzer, author of The Ten-Year Nap, goes even further. In a recent New York Times interview, she declares: “The notion that everyone has a calling, that everyone... Read More

Moving Forward: Part II

March 11th, 2008

…by Prill Boyle To be successful in any endeavor, you have to stick with it. And that\’s a lot easier to accomplish when you\’re doing what you enjoy. Passion is the purest fuel around. But even when you\’re doing what you love, it\’s easy to lose steam. Whether you\’re an aspiring novelist like me, an established businesswoman, or an astronaut, it takes an enormous commitment of time and energy to keep a dream moving forward. So if you\’re in danger of stalling, here are a few things to try: Divide your goal into smaller steps. When I complained... Read More