What can I say about Thanksgiving that hasn\’t been said before? Do I mention the overeating, which I\’m pretty sure is a law somewhere, or at least a requirement at my family\’s table, or do I talk about family and the ties that gag-uh, I mean bind? How about I tell you how every single […]
Daddy didn\’t care for TV. He used to call it the Boob Tube. Never did figure that one out. This week I found a little extra time to take in some BT and afterwards, I started thinking. I know, I know, you\’re saying to yourself, this is uncharted territory for da Queen, but I\’m here […]
Queenism: Step awayyyy from the swimsuit section. It\’ll make you cry. Forgetting this tidbit of knowledge, I went shopping for a swimsuit. How hard could it be? After all, I\’m a comfortable size 10, right? No need to answer that, it\’s one of those retro questions. Previously at the store, the “twenty-something” sales clerk had […]
I have this friend who I call “Chicken Little.” She\’s always forecasting doom and gloom and that\’s not all. Chicken knows every “Old Wives Tale” ever told and follows her horoscope as if it were her life\’s blueprint. I\’ve suggested they rename Horoscopes to “Hormonal-scopes” for us boomer-age women because Menopause and wacky hormones determine […]
Before you say it, I\’m not one of those people who hang on to their grown children never cutting the apron strings. Not this independent gal. No sir-ree. As my sons moved out, first the oldest, then the youngest, I kept a stiff upper lip and only cried after I saw their tail-lights disappear down […]
A friend recently gave me a sign that says, “The Queen is not accepting an audience today.” And today is one of those days. At least until my language improves. (Insert heavy-duty, royal sigh here) Have you ever bought a product that required “some light assembly” only to find that the manufacturer speaks with forked […]
Recently I received a taping of a speech I gave in another state. I was mortified. I called Mother immediately and asked, “Could my hair have looked any worse?” She said, “Ah, well yes, there was that tim-” Why do people answer you when you ask these kinds of questions? I decided it was time […]
I was reading a magazine article on Creativity that said, “Release the artist within.” I thought I have an artist within? I was captured. Knowing Valentine\’s Day was just around the corner, my gray cells starting working overtime. I didn\’t have a clue what to do, buy, or give my significant other. I really wanted […]
It\’s been said the pain of child birth fades over time. And so it goes with having a yard sale. I forgot the pain. Did my friends remind me? Try to stop me? Negative. They probably took great joy in watching me sweat preparing for this sale, and witnessing my grief over parting with my […]
One of my closest and dearest friends told me something yesterday that gave me food for thought. She said this year they\’re having a “light” instead of “white” Christmas. In other words, less is more. I thought to myself, “Now there\’s a plan! This is a woman after my own, disorganized heart.” Then again, I […]
