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Why Men Leave. What Every Woman (and Man) Needs to Know.

August 20th, 2009

Dear Dr. Jed, I was in my doctor’s waiting room and just so happened to read an article in the grapevine magazine about “The Irritable Male Syndrome.” This described my husband to a T. He’s started to take things out on my children getting very angry at them and bringing their confidence down. He would also degrade me about my weight and appearance and would call me names. He said that everything was my fault. I finally decided to take my kids away for a week to get away from him. We had a great time and I began to find myself again. When I got back I felt a lot better about... Read More

How I Got the World\’s Best Job

August 20th, 2009

I have the world\’s best job. I\’m a Futures Therapist. It\’s my job to help men, women, and children learn to live well in the world of the future. Really, there is no single future we are moving towards, but a number of possible futures. Most therapists are trying to help people to adapt to a world that no longer exists. Since the profession of Futures Therapist may be new to you, let me explain how I got it into it and how you can too. In 1965 I graduated from U.C. Santa Barbara and was on my way to U.C. San Francisco School of Medicine. I wasn\’t sure I wanted to be... Read More

Viagra for Women? Could the Little Blue Pill Be Right for You?

July 27th, 2009

Millions of middle-aged men have used Viagra in order to improve erections and enhance their sex lives. Ever since the drug was first released in 1998 there has been talk about the possible benefits for women suffering from sexual dysfunction. Certainly Pfizer (and other pharmaceutical companies) would like to expand their sales to the other half of the human population. Once a prescription drug is approved for at least one indication, physicians are free to prescribe it for any other disorders or symptoms for which they believe it would be effective, a practice called off-label prescribing.... Read More

Irritable Out-of-Work Men and the Women Who Love Them

July 27th, 2009

Dear Dr. Diamond, Three months ago my husband lost his job. I\’ve done my best to be understanding and supportive, but he\’s getting more irritable, angry, and withdrawn. I try and let him know I don\’t blame him, that it\’s the economy not something he\’s done wrong, but he just snaps my had off. It\’s hard enough not having his paycheck, but what\’s even worse is the strain this is putting on our relationship. I don\’t want our marriage to fall apart. What can I do? As a psychotherapist, specializing in men\’s health, I get letters... Read More

Where is the Most Peaceful Place on the Planet?

July 27th, 2009

A few years ago my wife and I spent three months in New Zealand. We were struck by the beauty of the country, the slow pace of life, and the friendliness of the people. We had a wonderful experience on December 21st, my birthday. My whole life I’ve celebrated the shortest, darkest day of the year. But in the Southern hemisphere, of course, it’s the longest, brightest day of the year. We were walking downtown and had planned to have dinner at a nice restaurant. It was late afternoon and my wife said she wanted to do a little shopping before the shops closed. I chuckled to myself and thought,... Read More

Dealing With the Irritable Male Syndrome: The Six Strategies Women Always Try and the Only Strategy that Actually Works

July 15th, 2009

I learned a lot about who was suffering from the Irritable Male Syndrome from letters I received from men and women. Here are two that are typical of many. A 32-year-old man writes, “Over the past 3 years especially, I have noticed that my relationship with my wife has begun to deteriorate. In the past there were open displays of affection and frequent verbal affirmations. Now, I seem to be irritable all the time. My attitude seems to be ‘don\’t come near me, don\’t talk to me, I had a hard day, I want the entire world to piss off\’. She now rarely tries to hug me, never initiates... Read More

Hey Guys, Are You Depressed and Don\’t Know It?

July 14th, 2009

My wife, Carlin, and I walked tentatively into the nicely restored old building to attend the “family weekend.” Our son had been in treatment for a drug problem and we were there to learn and offer support. As part of the weekend experience, all the family members were given various questionnaires to fill out. One was a depression questionnaire. We dutifully filled it out and my wife scored “high” while I scored “low.” Carlin talked to a counselor who suggested that she might want to get evaluated for depression when we returned home. Driving back we talked and it became clear that... Read More

Male Menopause: How It Impacts Men, Women, and Families

June 23rd, 2009

“Man is not the enemy here, but the fellow victim.” Betty Friedan The male mid-life is often talked about in general or humorous terms, but rarely is it discussed seriously. Jed Diamond is a world authority on men in the mid-life period, and here he suggests an alternative to the traditional treatment given to men in the media. “Dear Abby: I am a 50-year-old man who has been married for 22 years. My wife and I have two wonderful teen-aged children. About six months ago, my wife\’s niece (I\’ll call her Rene), whom I had never met, came from another country to live with us so... Read More