7 Things Nobody Ever Tells You About Empty Nest By Natalie Caine “I have found that to love and be loved is the most empowering and exhilarating of all human emotions.” — Jane Goodall 1.    No matter if you are married, single, career or non-career, tears will fall. 2.    You thought you prepared for the role shift and still you are confused who you are now and who your children are. 3.    Good news is you find new parts of yourself that had to go dormant and those parts bring happiness. 4.    Each person shifts uniquely and on their own timing because no one has the family... Read More

If you are a parent whose child is heading to college for the first time, or returning, hopefully you bought yourself a bandanna. Why, you ask? It lasts longer than Kleenex and is easier to find in your Mary Poppins bag filled with directions, camera, money, power bar, credit card, keys, and ID. I carried a blue one then. Now I am in the habit and carry a red one. People ask me,”What is that for?’ or they say, “Are you kidding me, you carry that in your purse everyday instead of tissues.” What can I say, I choose what I like. I for sure did not choose, sobbing once I got in the airplane... Read More

Boomers and Empty-Nesters don’t want to be over committed with schedules and yet they want to participate. I hear this over and over and I understand. They ask me how to choose, how do they know if they are making a difference, and will they be trained? You can begin by talking with yourself about things you like: Education Gardening The Arts Politics Going Green Medicine Law Nature Sports Leadership Animals Military Special education Make a list of what is fun for you. Sounds so simple and yet we forget that step. Then research those words with mentoring and volunteering attached and see... Read More

Sometimes you don\’t have a friend to go out and about. Your inner voice whines about the traffic or the loneliness, which are actually true, and you just can\’t seem to gear up. How about if you go for just an hour and before the traffic? Last weekend, I wanted some inspiration and entertainment. I had a busy weekend of shoulds and still needed something just for me. I actually wanted to go SOLO because of my schedule and rhythm. At the last minute, I went to a museum, even though, PEOPLE say don\’t go on the weekends. It was so easy and fun. I stopped in an outdoor food court... Read More

Baby boomers, empty nesters, new parents, grandparents, newlyweds, adult children, teens, divorced families, well you can add to this list, all wonder , WHY CAN”T WE GET ALONG? You are not going to be able to change me and I won’t be able to change you. Why is that idea so difficult? Parents want to change their children and their spouses for that matter. Children want their parents to change. The key to the heart is negotiating and acceptance. The myth is once you learn that, it will stick. Not true. Practice means practice. Vulnerability is vulnerability. You feel uncomfortable because... Read More

College is over. High school is over. Faded memories for everyone. Summer weddings and new families joining. Boot camp and service. Parents are asking me, now what? How do I have a good summer with my adult children and enjoy it when I know they will leave? Who am I? Transitions will never end, so don\’t you think it helps to practice enjoying the life you have now? When you jump ahead what value is given to you? Does it help you build a plan? Does it ask you how you are doing with trusting yourself and your adult children? Are you good at asking for help? Are the feelings of sadness appearing... Read More

Empty Nesters and their chicks are sitting on a fence. No one really knows what will happen in regards to the job market or how long they will fluff their nest, again. It is not looking good for some grads and for others; they are living their dream launch of the paycheck. They might have four roomies, but they aren\’t coming home. Key, as you know, is to communicate feelings and thoughts: You must be so disappointed that you worked so hard and can\’t make enough money to have your own place. Dad and I are thinking the way to share the space and responsibilities are to…… and then... Read More

Life changes whether expected or planned. Starting over is complex. What I hear over and over is, “I just need someone who gets what I am going through right now.” The reason I launched Empty Nest Support Services is because I did not want anyone to go through major life transitions alone. I have been through a list of them, including empty nest, illness, loss of loved ones, divorce, financial challenges, re-locating, career change in my fifties, re-marriage, loss of my best friend and more. I am passionate about passing on what I learned in order to help others know this is normal and there... Read More

One of my telephone consultation clients, Maria, said it for all of us, “I have no idea what I want and I am really tired.” First we addressed the tiredness because caring for our precious body that we lug around is top priority. We chatted about how she starts her day, what she is doing around three o\’clock and how does she end her evening? From the evaluation of a day in the life, she chose what would be possible for her to shift. Ok, you are curious and want to know what she chose. She set her timer to get up from her work desk and walk around. In the evening, she walked the neighborhood... Read More

Well, the sweeties are back to school or almost there and you turn to NOW WHAT? Patricia called and asked me what have you heard people are doing to find their new interests? First I want to share that some people like to leap to stay busy and others want to sit and reflect for awhile. There is no rule. What is true is knowing who you are and who you aren\’t. You need to accept you will make choices you don\’t like…some call that mistakes. Who doesn\’t make mistakes? Good news. Grieving is normal when you hug someone you love goodbye. Your tears are a deeper flood because... Read More