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Monday - January 24, 2022
 

ON THE WAY TO EMPTYING THE NEST

July 11th, 2007

A mother told me during a telephone consultation that her daughter is a junior in high school and crying. Crying because her friends are seniors and leaving for college. She doesn\’t know if they will even be friends once they go to college. Those tears brought questions to the mom. What will I be like when my daughter leaves? I know it isn\’t for two years, but already I am dreading the empty nest. I just love her friends coming over and all the school activities my daughter and I share. I don\’t\’ care how messy the kitchen is or how I have to dash here and there.... Read More

Aftermath

July 11th, 2007

The house is quiet now. All the children have left, and I am starting the therapeutic work of picking up from the chaos. I move slowly, bone-tired yet unable to relax. I\’m putting down on the coffee table the breakable items that were moved to higher, safer ground. I\’m fluffing the sofa pillows that were stacked to form a fort. I\’m straightening the throw rug that was skewed from sliding feet. I\’m wiping off sticky piano keys and putting the top down. Now I go to the bedroom where the grandchildren slept. I\’m changing the sheets that were pulled up in a wrinkly... Read More

Men Are Human Too

July 11th, 2007

To hear many relationship “experts” tell it, men are still stuck in primitive, caveman mentality. These experts admonish women to be passive and play hard to get. Why? Because, in order for a woman to interest them, they claim that men need to be on the hunt. If men aren\’t made to feel the need to pursue and capture they won\’t feel sufficiently masculine and driven to conquer and protect the woman who excites these primitive urges. But these experts never say how true love and real romance are created and kept alive once the marriage vows have been taken. What does a... Read More

THEY\’RE BACK

June 12th, 2007

“There is more to life than increasing its speed” Gandhi I love the feeling of the word summer. Playtime is expected and we are even given more light. Whether our children are at home or away , I think we need to plan our own playtime , which of course all of us know, but and yes there is a but . . . we wait to see if our kids will be home or if they might want to go to dinner or the beach or a movie. We aren\’t dependent. We simply love having time with our children. Isn\’t it a challenge when they first come back home to not wait and see what they are going to do?... Read More

Everything I Needed to Learn, I Learned from my Grandchildren

June 11th, 2007

By Dina Santorelli Ask any grandparent what they\’ve learned after 50 or 60 years of living on earth, after retirement parties, children\’s weddings, bar mitzvahs, Christenings, surgeries, globe-trotting travels and more, and they\’ll tell you this, that everything they needed to learn, they learned from their grandchildren, from those tiny human beings who have graced the planet for just a few years, months or even seconds. Culled from an informal poll of grandparents across the country, here are our top 10 favorite things that grandparents say they\’ve learned from their... Read More

Your Soul Will Lead You Home

June 11th, 2007

There is a particular verse, performed by Sinead O\’Connor… “Thank you for loving me, Thank you for seeing me, Thank you for hurting me, Thank you for tearing me apart.” While it\’s possible to interpret this lyric as an ode to abuse, you\’d miss the deepest meaning if you headed off in that direction. Instead, let\’s look at what it means to be loved. Truly loved. It doesn\’t mean dancing in the daisies without a care in the world. And it doesn\’t mean hiding behind a mask for fear that who you are isn\’t truly loveable. It does mean... Read More

Keeping Perspective

May 9th, 2007

May, the month of Mother\’s Day, kids on the way to graduating high school and college, getting a job or planning a wedding. May. May we… find excitement in figuring out what is next for us have new visions of how to relate to our adult children have faith that our children have learned to make good decisions for themselves feel okay about them not knowing what is next for them realize they left our nests because they were ready to fly Empty nesting is the stage of life where the days of planning meals, carpooling kids and overseeing homework are replaced with the exciting days... Read More

“Are You Free to Be Fabulous?”

May 9th, 2007

“Who do you think you are?” “Don\’t get a swelled head!” “Remember where you came from.” “Think you\’re too good for us?” “People like us don\’t go to places like that.” That list of hold-backs could go on and on. And every one of us-including you- has been subjected to some form of commandment to NOT break out beyond where you came from, to not leave your “station” in order to be truly fabulous. Whether it came from a demanding and controlling parent, a terrified and anxious teacher, an abusive... Read More

Money Can Buy Grand Memories

April 25th, 2007

By Brian H. Breuel Putting aside a college fund for your grandchildren is sensible and admirable, but remember to enrich their lives and yours in the here and now. I would imagine every grandparent has thought, if not promised, that their grandchild will have opportunities that only we as grandparents can provide. And as unlikely as that claim may be in fact, we know from the first moment we hold that new generation that we do have something unique to offer. And yet, when we begin to think of ways to deliver on that promise, we tend to revert to the more obvious vehicles, such as custodial... Read More

“How Do You Know It\’s Love?”

April 13th, 2007

Real love and real romance, the kind that lasts a lifetime, that\’s what most people want. So why does dating have a bad rap? And why do more than half of all marriages end up in divorce? The answer\’s pretty clear when you look at what most people settle for, or worse yet, put up with. But, the fact is, there\’s a world of deep spiritual connection, great adventure, and rich unfolding romance . . . all available when you know what you\’re looking for . . . and how to let love lead every day. In our twenty years of being together (nineteen married) we\’ve conducted... Read More