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Wednesday - December 1, 2021
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Year-End Special

December 14th, 2010

Year-End Special By Barbara E. Friesner My father used to quip:  What do you get the person who has everything?  A box to put it in. Oddly enough – that’s not such a bad suggestion!  Especially now when you’re helping them get rid of stuff! The kind of box doesn’t necessarily matter. What matters is what you put into it. Once I gave my mother a Mother’s Day card that said something to the effect of:  “I may have been a difficult child but I never deliberately stepped on a crack.”  My mother read the card and looked at me and it was obvious that she totally... Read More

The Silent Generation – Another Key to the Eldercare Code

November 29th, 2010

The Silent Generation – Another Key to the Eldercare Code By Barbara E. Friesner, NABBW’s Eldercare Expert My first article for the National Association of Baby Boomer Women was exactly 5 years ago (which staggers me!!)    That first article was about our Vicky-D (Victorian/Depression era generation) parents who are now about 85 years old and up – born roughly between 1905 and 1925. I mentioned that Vicky-D’s are generally (and I say generally because what is true for most is not true for all.  Other factors – such as region of country, raised in the city or country, economic... Read More

Happy New Year!

October 31st, 2010

Happy New Year! By Barbara E. Friesner Did you notice the energy in the air right after Labor Day?  It was really palpable here in NYC.  Everyone just somehow seemed to walk a little lighter!  Maybe it’s that this was such a miserable summer that people were just relieved that it was over.  Or maybe it’s the start of a new year!  Sure, I know people think January 1st is the start of the new year but September and a new school year always marked a fresh new beginning for me.  I loved going back to school . . . .  Seeing old friends; meeting new ones; new classes; new teachers; all the... Read More

Have You Had That Conversation With Your Aging Parents?

September 22nd, 2010

We want our parents to use computers and the internet. The good news is that more and more of them are. The bad news is that an alarming number of them are also falling prey to identity thieves and internet scammers. I\’m sure you\’ve seen them – emails from banks, credit card companies, and stores that say that there is some problem with your account. They may tell you there has been fraudulent or suspicious activity and you have to confirm your information. Some will threaten to suspend or close your account or report you to the credit bureau if you do not respond. Then they tell... Read More

Is Your Approach to Eldercare Like Deferred Maintenance?

August 22nd, 2010

What Is the Cost of Waiting? In 1975, NYC went nearly bankrupt. In an attempt to save money, it was decided that the city would not paint the bridges that year so they could use the money somewhere else. The next year, the “somewhere else” again expected to receive the bridge money . . . and got it – and for another year, the bridges were not painted. By the time the money was allocated back to the bridges, instead of just the cost of paint, there was serious damage to the infrastructure that ultimately cost 10 if not 100 times more in repairs – to say nothing of the impact on traffic... Read More

How To Avoid “Return To Sender”

July 7th, 2010

I have always been a big postcard sender and a recent vacation was no exception! Watching me write the cards, one of the friends with whom I was traveling, a woman in her 80\’s, mentioned how sad it is that she\’s lost contact with many of her friends over the past several years. She said she doesn\’t know if her friends are sick, have passed away, or moved, and she doesn\’t know how to find out. Two of the most common reasons she hasn\’t heard from them are 1) physical or cognitive issues have made it impossible for her friends to communicate; and 2) her friends moved... Read More

Getting More Like My Mother Every Day

June 11th, 2010

“You\’re getting to be more like your mother every day!” Whenever I do something weird or funny (like talking with total strangers at another table in a restaurant), that\’s what my sister tells me. Well . . . the other day I caught a look of myself as I passed a store window. OMG – I couldn\’t believe what I was seeing. There I was, wearing a photography vest that had been my mother\’s. It\’s khaki colored with pockets for everything a photographer would need (with a diagram inside each side panel so you know what every pocket is for!). So practical and yet... Read More

3 Key Tips for Families with Loved Ones in a Nursing Home

May 12th, 2010

A few weeks ago, man by the name of Omar Cain posted a video on my Facebook page. One look at the video and I fell in love! After seeing his video, I just had to talk with him and find out more about him. Turns out Omar is a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) extraordinaire at the Golden LivingCenter in Stenton, PA. In addition to his CNA work, he also trains CNA students and those thinking about the field. What I found is a man lucky enough to have found his calling and the desire and ability to share what he knows with others in such a way that they are inspired too. With everyone as busy... Read More

What\’s My Motivation?

April 12th, 2010

Whatever topic you need to discuss with your aging loved one, the objective is to bring up and discuss it in such a way that your aging loved one will willingly do what\’s in their best interest. Unfortunately, however, the reality is that no one can make anyone want to do anything. All anyone can do is help someone see why doing something is in their best interest and therefore, why they would want to. This is true when working with anyone – the elderly, spouses and kids. For example: You want your son to pick up his clothes but he never does. You\’ve tried every reason you can... Read More

Sometimes It’s Good To Wallow

March 15th, 2010

Five or six mornings a week, I walk 4 to 6 miles in Central Park. I get great joy from meandering. It’s something I do for my head more than for my body. In the past few years I’ve started feeding the birds and now the Cardinals come directly to me when they hear me shake the bag of bird seed. The other morning, as I was feeding the birds, a guy with a dog came by. I nodded but he started screaming at me about how dare I spend money feeding birds when there are homeless and starving children in the world. I was very surprised and then started to laugh and pointed out that as a woman, I can... Read More