By Ann Leach, NABBW’s Associate for Loss and Change

I saw this meme on Facebook the other day:

Ann Oct articleI got the point and immediately began to do a life scan of what in me and around me needs to die.

That sounds dramatic, doesn’t it?

I don’t believe it has to be. I think it simply comes down to a decision. That decision can do one of two things: contribute to your comfort or nudge you forward to something even better.

But why is it so hard? Why do we hate letting go?

My head knows that I am always connected to my loved one through my memories, but my heart feels the pain of not having them here physically.

Or my head knows that this new job opportunity is going to provide more money for my family and new challenges for me, but my heart misses the fun times with co-workers or the satisfaction of seeing client X make even more progress this year.

Whatever the loss, its just plain tough.

Let me share 3 tips for letting go today:

1) Scan your life and notice what parts no longer serve you.

Look at your health, money, love, spirit, home, volunteer work, fun time and career. One of the things I noticed was that, in the area of volunteering, I still love to give back but I really hate long meetings full of chatter. I’ve let go of participating in them by letting the chairperson of the committee know that I can give 1 hour to the meeting and then I will have to leave. Claiming better boundaries has helped me continue to enjoy the volunteer work I do. Once you have noted what no longer works for you, then decide if

a) you still want to be involved in some way or

b) if you are ready to let this particular situation or person go.

2) Create a letting go ritual.

It doesn’t have to be a big public event, but some acknowledgement of your decision is helpful. I might write a letter to the person I am releasing but never send it. I might light a candle and reflect on the good times and lessons learned from a particular situation that I now need to move on from and into something better.

3) Honor the past to move forward.

Take note of the positive gifts and lessons given to you by your loved one, the job you’re letting go of, the family home you’re moving from, etc. and know that those experiences and memories got you to today. Look forward to where you want to go next and build on the strength of those experiences.

Ann LeachThe owner of the Creative Cottage in Joplin, Missouri, Ann Leach is a highly experienced coach, speaker and writer focused on building a global grief community designed to assist people in moving through loss and change after a life-altering event.

She also owns and operates Life Preservers Grief Support, a global grief support community, as well as Your Grief Relief Solution.  Her goal: To help people make peace with grief. The Life Preservers site offers a signup link her free ezine, “In the Flow.”

Ann’s preferred training tools include teleseminars, publications and products, retreats, conference break-out sessions and special events.

She serves individuals and professionals at work and at home. Her strengths are group facilitation, strong interviewing skills, low cost/no cost ideas for marketing support, developing your writing and presenting skills, creating joint ventures.