What can you do when someone reveals abuse? B - Believe her and believe in her* E - Educate yourself; share your knowledge R - Reassure her that is was not her fault E - Empower with information and resources A - Ask what you can do and do your best L - Listen without judgment to what is said *It is estimated that at least 1 in 3 women and 1 in 5 men will be a victim of abuse violence in their lifetime. The female pronoun is used for both genders. Created by Lynn C. Tolson, author of Beyond the Tears: A True Survivor’s Story founder of The Project for TEARS: Telling Everyone About Rape &... (Read More ...)
Excerpt paraphrased from Beyond the Tears: A True Survivor’s Story Not long after the marriage ceremony, my new husband, Todd, wanted to buy land in Chandler, Arizona. He said we could get rich quick on the land while living cheap in a trailer. I was only twenty-one, and I objected to moving out of Tempe, away from my Arizona State University campus friends. Todd threw fits, until it seemed easier to comply with his wishes than to confront his temper. So we moved deep into the desert, past the dairy farm and the rodeo arena, where the alfalfa fields were newly zoned for mobile homes. It was... (Read More ...)
In this series for October, Domestic Violence Awareness Month, author Lynn C. Tolson examines the aspects of insidious forms of domestic abuse. What is emotional abuse, and how does it pertain to domestic violence? Emotional or mental abuse occurs when one partner attempts to make the other feel bad about herself. Emotional/mental abuse often crosses lines with psychological abuse. These forms of abuse are destructive to self-esteem and self-confidence. Here is part of Lynn’s story to illustrate emotional abuse: When I was nineteen, I was involved with a man eighteen years older than me.... (Read More ...)
Your friend says of a mutual friend, “Her husband is abusing her.” Does the image on the left come to mind? Or do you think of an abused woman as beaten and battered, with black eyes and broken bones? Yet, some forms of domestic violence are invisible. In 1976, when I was twenty-two years old, a friend and I were standing in the kitchen of my apartment. Sally was a seamstress, and she was pinning the waist of my skirt for alterations. We were chatting comfortably. My husband of a year burst into the apartment. He scared me; my body froze. As if I were not in the room, he stated, “She wouldn’t... (Read More ...)
